Tag Archives: marriage

Worse Than and Infidel

1 Timothy 5:8

8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

Before we look at what this all means, we must first look at the word “infidel”. According to Webster an infidel is “someone who does not believe in religion of adheres to a religion other than their own”. This is commonly what we think about this word when we come across this verse. We think Paul is saying this person is worse than an unbeliever, and in many ways that is true. But it is not necessarily someone who does not have any religion, or even who adheres to another religion. This same Greek word, apistos, is used when talking about Thomas doubting that Jesus was alive. It is used by Jesus when talking about Christians who reject the true faith. In other words, we are looking at a person who doubts the Gospel and the precepts outlined therein. He does not place his faith in the truth and therefore is labeled an unbeliever.

Are there things in the word that you doubt? Or do you adhere that everything in the Bible is completely accurate, without flaw. How about the creation account? Do you doubt that God created the world, the universe, and all that is therein in 6 days and then took a day off? Do you adhere to some of the different explanations of the “6 days”, like each day is a thousand years, or even a million or billion? Or is there a huge gap between Genesis 1:1-2 and verse 3? Or does the use of the word day constitute the limited understanding of Moses so he just made it up? Do you doubt creation?

Do you doubt Genesis Chapter 3 and original sin? Do you doubt that because Adam sinned, his seed was passed down to all men, and that seed was the seed of sin? Do you adhere to the wisdom of man that says everyone is born good and right with God? Do you think sin comes from each of us doing the wrong things, or saying the wrong things? Do you think some people can go through life without sin and therefor not need a Savior? Do you doubt original sin?

Do you doubt the 1o plagues that hit Egypt and the resulting Exodus? Do you doubt that manna came from heaven, or that God write on tables of stone, or that millions of quails came from nowhere to feed the children of Egypt? Do you doubt that God parted the Red Sea, thinking instead that it was some strong wind or an earthquake which is the wisdom of man? Do you doubt Abraham would have sacrificed his son, or that the walls of Jericho fell with a shout, or that Daniel escaped from the lion’s den unharmed?

What part of the Bible do you doubt? There Are So many outrageous stories in there it would be easy to doubt a few of them, wouldn’t it? I mean, after all, what fish could swallow a man? What man could aim a stone that good with a slingshot? What kind of person could kill a thousand others with the jawbone of an ass? There is so much we could doubt.

But when we start to doubt just one little thing, it is easy to doubt a second thing, and a third. It is easy to start questioning the Bible and its precepts and commands, instead deciding to just believe the promises and ignore the laws. I will take all the blessings of Deuteronomy 28 and just ignore the curses because a loving God certainly would not allow any of that to fall on me. A loving God would just take everyone to heaven, wouldn’t He? Who cares if the Bible says many will call Him Lord, Lord, but he will say depart from me. Jesus died so we would all go to heaven, right? I don’t have to do anything or say anything.

Just because God says that a man lying with a man is an abomination doesn’t make it true. God is love. He loves everyone, and we should not be against two people who love each other. Who cares that God says marriage is between a man and a woman? If two people love each other that’s all that counts. Who cares that God says he formed us in our mother’s womb and that he has known us since the day we were conceived? That fetus is not living so a woman should be able to destroy it anytime she wants. Right?

Do you start to see how much doubt there is in the world today, and even in the church? Do you start to see how we have justified holding onto man’s wisdom and putting aside God’s wisdom through His word? After all, if the Bible is not true, I don’t have to be responsible to an almighty God. Even if one part is not true, I can easily start justifying that other parts might be untrue as well. The church is starting to latch onto things that we are told are wrong by the Word of God. We have lost our fear of the truth and replaced it with our own version of truth and out own wisdom.

If Thomas was an infidel (the same word was used here), then are we not the same if we do not believe God’s word is truth? If we don’t believe, are we not unbelievers as well? I challenge you today to examine yourself. Examine your thoughts. Examine what you truly believe? I pray you find yourself believing the truth of God’s Word and not the lies of the enemy, or even of your fellow man. As Paul so wonderfully pout it in Romans 3:4 “Let God be true and every man a liar”

This verse tells us that we are to provide for our families or we are worse than someone who does not believe. Men have become so lax in our society. They produce babies and then just walk away. They are irresponsible and self-centered, having only their own interests in mind. It is a scourge on our society and is at the heart of all the violence we see in our country. It is not just about money and provision in a material way. It is about providing spiritual, emotional and mental guidance as well. If you are lacking in any of these areas, ask God to help you. Be the best father you can be. Lord knows we need good, strong men in our world, and we need Godly fathers even more!

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A Heavenly Relationship

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

“As the Church is subject unto Christ!”  Let me see.  Christ ministered to the church and still does.  Christ cared so much for the church He gave His life.  Christ would never do anything to harm the church in any way.  Christ only wants to see the church grow and flourish in this age, and for ages to come.  Christ nurtures the church, instructs the church, provides for the church, sanctifies the church, protects the church, loves the church.  I would think any wife who has a husband that fulfills these things would  be happy to submit to him.

Submission does not mean subservient.  It does not mean she is the maid.  It does not mean the husband can run roughshod over her.  It will never mean he can harm her in any way – emotionally, physically or mentally.  Submit means that when a major disagreement comes up, the husband has the final say, as long as the interests of both parties are served by that decision.  The marriage as a whole needs to be the benefactor.  So If the argument is over buying a boat verses fixing a hole in the roof, the roof wins every time.  Sorry guys, your toys are not always important to the marriage as a whole. Yes, you guys are the  head of the marriage, but you  are not tyrants.  You are partners, and she is your helper.  If you are anything like me, you underestimate her ability to contribute. I am still learning  after 38 years just  how valuable she is in that role.

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

It always amazes me that three times the scripture says husbands should love their wives, but nowhere does it say wives should love their husbands.  I still do not have that figured out.  My only thought is that women have a natural compassion build into the, and most men need to be prodded to have that emotion come out.  Maybe it’s because men are more likely to be self-centered and prideful, and women are more likely to be others-centered and humble.

The admonition is to treat the women with the love Christ has for the4 church.  Men should treat their wives in a way that they will be glorious!  That there will not be a scar, emotional or physical, on their body or soul.  And that they would be holy and without blemish.  I wish I could go back in time and redo a lot of things in my marriage.  I have  done emotional harm to my wife in the past.  Yelling, accusations, mistrust and putting down was not uncommon, and I so regret it.  I have learned that she is my most valuable asset, and I honor her.

28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

Just as we are members of Christs, body, flesh and bones, so is our wife members with us.  If she hurt, we should hurt.  If she has a concern, it should be our concern.  If she has plans, we should honor those plans.  If she has dreams, we should help her reach those dreams.  We should help her as we would help ourselves, treat her as we would want to be treated,  Hmmm…sounds a lot like the golden rule, doesn’t it?  She is a part of us.

31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

To  those men that still cling to their Mom’s, opinion, there mom’s cooking, their Dad’s idea of success, – anything of their parents before marriage, stop today and reset.  She is your wife now.  Your parents no longer should be making any decisions for your family.  You and your wife should make those decisions.  Same thing for the wives.  You cannot serve two masters!